Product Details
Gay and Single...Forever?: 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know

Gay and Single...Forever?: 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know
By Steven Bereznai

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Product Description

Journalist Steven Bereznai — presentable, accomplished, well educated, successful, and in his early 30s — has never had a boyfriend. "Is Singlesville my final destination?" Bereznai wonders. Or does a partner await? And what does he really want? To pair up, or to maintain the independence of a single life? Now in Gay and Single . . . Forever?, Bereznai investigates the basic question of whether there can be acceptance for him and other single gay men—as single men—where the push to partner with a man has replaced the pressure to marry a woman. Bringing together a perfect mix of personal narrative, historical research, interviews with dozens of gay men — including Andrew Holleran, Michael Bronski, and Wayson Choy — and intensely penetrating social and psychological insight, Gay and Single . . . Forever? will resonate deeply among gay men —many of whom, even today, spend most of their lives not in a relationship.

Product Details

  • Amazon Sales Rank: #121378 in Books
  • Published on: 2006-08-22
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Binding: Paperback
  • 288 pages

Editorial Reviews

About the Author
Steve Bereznai (Bur-ez-nay) is a writer/producer for CBC TV. He lives in Toronto, Canada.

Customer Reviews

Vapid2
To sum it up in one word: Vapid. Written by and about exactly the type of gay man(?) who makes me want to renounce my homosexualty. I am half way through this book and don't think I will be able to finish it. The meat of this book is a collection of woeful societial oppression collected & cited from other's works. It seems like a shallow circuit queen's way of excusing her own failure in the relationship arena.

I don't mean to seem bitter, but for around $10.85 Charlotte Kasl's "If the Buddha Dated" is a much better way to get in touch with yourself; Which seems to be the core message of this book.

Berenzai's book makes for the 11th thing I should know about being gay and single.

Not a practical book for the single guy1
Sorry, this book wasn't for me. I gave it a chance, but its language just didn't reach out to me. But mostly, it just wasn't practical enough for me. There were interesting stories shared, like the one where the "friends with benefits" guy actually steps up and helps the author paint in a moment of crisis. Don't get me wrong, that was really sweet. There were a few moments like that.

But I'm newly single and trying to figure out how to date, and this didn't help me do that. I was looking for bulleted lists. Checklists. Nuts and bolts. Succinct and discrete steps. I didn't get that.

LOOKING FOR LOVE....or not4
Bereznai, Steven, Gay and Single...Forever?: 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know. Avalon 2006

Wow!!!!!!! That is a title for you. Here in this original, quite brave and easily arguable book comes a formula on what and what not to do about being single. The thesis concerns whether it is better to be single or not. It seems that since we became "liberated" after Sonewall, after the marches on Washington and after the multitude of changes in attitudes toward us, that gay men are opting to be, shall we say, unattached. Yet, on the other hand, there is a great deal being said about being partnered. Bereznai examines the issues of whether there is room for a single gay guy in today's modern society. He does this by interviews with gay men, through personal revelations and with detailed commentary based on both psychological and social thought. He wrote this book for us, and especially for the man who wants to stay single.

Berenzai starts off by telling us that the talk of gay marriage and being partnered, which has been such a hot topic of conversation, is "whimsy" as long as there are so many more important issues facing us. Yet essentially the struggle today is for equality--the enemy has not changed--it is still hate and fear. In other words, it is the same old war, just the battles are different.

This book is the result of a search for intimacy at a time when "gay singles are the new pariahs". (Interesting thought). Bereznai uses his own state of perpetual singledom as he sets out to explain his work. And what he has discovered while being single releases his thoughts about the needs of gay men and thereby gives a chronology of the shifting of relationships and how this has affected the cultural and political life of the entire gay community. His writing is heartfelt and witty at the same time. Although he writes from the heart, he doesn't ignore the mind or the other parts of the body. His remarks are "right on", sometimes so true that they hurt. This is a book for all those who live without love but want it very badly. There are times that I felt I was reading Carrie Bradshaw's column. One critic has called this book the "new gay bible". It certainly will help you understand why you never brought the lucky guy home to meet the folks.

Allow me to share some of the chapter titles with you. We start off with "Gay is good--being gay and single used to be, too". How about "Husbands and boyfriends don't guarantee happiness" and "Boyfriends can be like prostitutes---Prostitutes can be like boyfriends". And then there is my favorite, "Wanting to be with someone is natural....not wanting to stay with him is, too" Paul Rudnick, the gay playwright is quoted on the back cover, "Being gay and single is the new smoking. It won't be socially acceptable anymore, and you will have to go outside." That pretty well sums the book up.