Product Description

An important reference, written by an adoptee, is valuable to anyone affected by adoption and includes guidance on making the decision to search, negotiating legalities, surviving the emotional turbulence of a reunion, and dealing with the impact on adoptive parents.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #276196 in Books
• Published on: 1994-06-01
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 363 pages

From Booklist
An adoptee offers compassionate and comprehensive guidance to locating "adoptees, birthparents and adoptive parents." Strauss proceeds from the view that seeking reunion with relatives estranged by adoption is a good thing, and she marshals impressive reasoning and evidence to support her case. She discusses the laws that make adoption records confidential in the introduction and thereby sets the stage for the search strategies that follow. As Strauss points out, the history of adoption is neither simple nor consistent, and the nature of adoption today is very different from what it was when present adoption laws were enacted. The more a searcher understands the nature of adoption practices and laws, she says, the more likely his or her search is to succeed. Strauss interweaves the story of the search for her own birthparents with the strategies for finding birth relatives, and whether or not one agrees with the practice of adoptees or birthparents initiating searches for lost relatives, she tells that personal story compellingly. Thus, Strauss' effort offers considerable insight into the motivations of a particular adoptee as it encourages and counsels others wishing to undertake such a search themselves. Mike Tribby

Customer Reviews

A great book for any adoptee looking for the truth.
I bought this book after reading "The Girls Who Went Away" by Ann Fessler and I'm glad I did. It really brings the subject of adoption full circle by telling the stories from all sides of the coin. But it also gives A Lot of starting points and next steps for people to use while doing their own search. My brother and I are both adoptees. I found my birth mother over 16 years ago but she had died in a car accident 6 months after I was born. Took me 15 more years to find my birth father. Both finding my birth mother and birth father were purely the grace of God because I had absolutely nothing to go on. My brother recently asked me to help him locate his birth parents and I'm so glad I purchased this book. Not only for the large quantity of resources it lists, but so I can also prepare him for the many different outcomes he may experience. I can also add, that by reading this book, it has been an emotional rollercoaster. Being able to relate to so many feelings, stories, dreams has really been healing in a lot of ways. Knowing there are so many people out there with similar emotions due to being adopted has been comforting in some strange way. I'd have to say one of my favorite parts of the book is when it talks about how society continues to view the adopted child as just that, a child. Society never took into account that we, as adopted children, would grow up to become contributing adults who have every right to know about ourselves, where we came from and everything pertaining to our lives. I guess if I had to pick one word to explain how this book made me feel it would be EMPOWERED.

Very relevant and informative...
I found this book incredibly helpful in helping me deal with searching for and eventually reuniting with my birthmother. I bought it a year and a half ago, and I've referred back to it so many times that it looks like I've had it much longer. It gives very helpful advice for everyone involved in adoption and allows you to see all sides of the issue. Also, the testimonials and Jean Strauss's search and reunion story give the book a very personal feel. Overall, a great book for anyone connected to adoption.

This book is a wealth of information and guidance . . . .
Being adopted, my interest in finding books relating to my own thoughts and journey was quite a challenge. Interestingly, I found this book after finding my birthmother and two siblings. The book was a confirmation of every step and emotion I felt. I can't reccomend this book enough. It is written in a non-threatning and caring tone. Every adoptee or a parent that has relinguished a child should read it if for no other reason than to educate oneself.