Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #6502 in Books
• Published on: 2003-11
• Format: Bargain Price
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 172 pages

Customer Reviews

Structure and routine does not equate abuse and lack of love
Most of the 1-star reviewers feels that the methods of this book is abusive and restricting - I think that's complete rubbish.

Having a routine and structure with your kids does not mean you are loving them less, abusing their creativity/freedom, and abusing them in the name of discipline. In fact, the book advocates different types of playtime: roomtime being an independent playtime in a room, free time being a time where the child gets to choose what he wants to do, structured playtime being a time when a parents chooses the activity, and playtimes with family members. Which one of these sound abusive or restrictive? When the child grows old enough to go to school, what do parents think happen? The teachers choose the activities and there will be a disciplinary guideline that your children will follow, so how is this book anything different?

Also, when it comes to handling curious toddlers who get into everything, the book suggests substitution over restriction and distraction. Substitution as defined in the book is to offer an equally desirable experience similar to the original one that caught the toddler's attention, but the location and time will be decided by mom. An example in the book, a child gets into the dog bowl and splashes the water. The alternate substitution for this behavior would be to give the toddler a clean bowl of water on the patio and let the child have at it. Again, what about this is abusive or restrictive?

I also see one reviewer comment on the sample schedule in the book (she gives a paraphrased version in her review). The problem with this reader is that she is not keeping in mind that this is an example routine that ONE mom used for her kids. That doesn't meant the book is saying every single family should follow this schedule where the kids play in half-hour increments using different play techniques. It's taking the book quite too literally.

Anyone who watches Super Nanny or Nanny 911 will know that basically all the families that have problems with their children lack a stable and predictable routine for their kids, and proper discipline techniques. Which led to the parents being burnt out to the point they no long enjoy being parents.

I think people who rated the book poorly have problems with responsible parenting. The Webster Dictionary definition of "nurture" is this: 1. to feed and protect, 2. to support and encourage, 3. to bring up, train, educate. To be nurturing means to parent in a way that meets the above definition. It is the responsibility of parents to love AND educate AND train their kids into responsible and morally upright people. If we raise our children in a way that allows them to have no respect for us, not obeying our guidelines/boundaries, and letting them do whatever the heck they want, then who's to say that they will not do the same to other adult for the rest of their lives.

I can't think of anything less nurturing.
With this book, your toddler is sure to be independent enough to live in his own apartment by the age of 3. However, where's the love? There's little to no nurturing in Ezzo's ways. It's completely un-intuitive as a mother. I would never recommend this book or this parenting philosophy.

kids
I love this whole series of books. Very practical information for kids. I started this book when my oldest was two and she was driving me crazy when I got on the phone, one of the first things they dealt with was that very issue! Wonderful for people who like a routine!!