Product Description

This is a book that Cathy Crimmins never hoped to write: the story of how a tragic accident nearly destroyed her family; of how in a split second their lives were changed forever.

In 1996, Cathy Crimmins, her husband, Alan, and their daughter, Kelly, were on an idyllic lakeside holiday when a boating accident left Alan in a deep coma, with severe damage to the frontal lobes of his brain, the area that controls speech, memory, movement, and personality. Where Is the Mango Princess? is the story of what happened to Cathy and her family after Alan woke up.

From the frustrations of dealing with doctors ("The first doctor, whom we call Dr. Asshole, swooped down from the great Neurosurgery in the Sky to tell me he has nothing to tell me") and insurance plans ("You know what our HMO's brain surgery plan is? They give your wife a Black & Decker drill and an instruction booklet") to the enigmas of personality, mortality, and modern science, Where Is the Mango Princess? is a chronicle of an unforgettable transformation.

Crimmins's story is full of unexpected and hard-won wisdom: a reminder of the precariousness of health, of fortune, of life itself; an indictment of HMOs and the bureaucrats bred by them; a lesson in how resilient love is, and how wide its compass. Most of all, though, it is Cathy's ability to confront absurdity head-on and not be undone by it that awes and inspires us, in what may be the most miraculous, the most healing, the most uniquely human trait of all--the gift of wit, and how it held her together in the face of the worst life has to offer.

Writing with grace, candor, and remarkable clarity, Cathy Crimmins charts her husband's painful and often astonishing journey through the world of the brain-injured and takes readers on a voyage--life-affirming in even its darkest moments--through neurology, identity, and the mysteries of the human brain.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #629206 in Books
• Published on: 2000-09-19
• Released on: 2000-09-19
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Hardcover
• 272 pages

Amazon.com
"Alan's brain got run over by a speedboat," Cathy Crimmins writes. "That last sentence reads like a bad country-western song lyric, but it's true. It was a silly, horrible, stupid accident." And so begins the harrowing tale of a family vacation gone awry when a speedboat collides with her husband's small craft, changing their lives forever. Crimmins (The Seven Habits of Highly Defective People and When My Parents Were My Age They Were Old... or Who Are You Calling Middle-Aged?) is used to writing with wit, self-effacing humor, and a warmth that can bring readers to their knees--or at least to tears of laughter. But in this stunning memoir about her husband's brain injury and the subsequent fallout, Crimmins has outdone herself, bringing all her sharply honed narrative skills into play as she tackles the life-wrenching drama of witnessing her husband's near death and ensuing rebirth as a very different person.

Crimmins takes readers inside the drama with all the right details and interior feelings to keep us fully mesmerized: her 7-year-old daughter's ashen face, her husband's twitching body, the paramedic's alarming question, "Is your husband one of these people that ordinarily has large pupils?" As deftly as she takes readers inside this personal story of not-quite recovery--more like discovery--she is also able to pan back and show readers the comedic silver lining (the self-important doctors, the moments of mishaps, and of course, the whereabouts of the mysterious Mango Princess) that lies within the cloud of her family's tragedy. Anyone who has endured a head trauma or loved someone who has will be engrossed by this wise and knowledgeable storyteller. The rest of us will have a captivating lesson about the rejuvenation of the brain as well as the human heart. --Gail Hudson

From Publishers Weekly
Although it was frightening when Crimmins's husband, Alan, an attorney, suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI) while on a family vacation, it was his long-term rehabilitation that proved most daunting, for brain injuries can cause significant personality changes. This chronicle of Al's injury, treatment and rehabilitation shows how perplexing and stressful traumatic brain injury can be for both victim and family. Crimmins (When My Parents Were My Age, They Were Old and Newt Gingrich's Bedtime Stories for Orphans) knows how to tell a story for maximum effect, filling this account with funny and outrageous anecdotes, raw emotion and predictable rage toward HMOs that won't fund optimal treatment. Like many TBI patients, Al became bizarrely uninhibited; Crimmins describes how he swears profusely and masturbates in public, and her worries about suddenly being married to a stranger: "I once had a husband who was doing a dissertation on Samuel Beckett, who had a thing for obscure Japanese cinema.... I can't imagine being married to a man who won't be able to discuss books or go to the theater with me." Despite Alan's extraordinarily good recovery, Crimmins muses, "I miss his dark side.... Now I wince as he chortles over mediocre cartoons... with TBI he has become what he wasn't before, a regular, uncomplicated guy." Though this story is an eye-opener on some levels, it remains essentially shallow. More information on neurological research would have been welcome, and attention to the experience of other TBI families (to which Crimmins devotes only three paragraphs) would have added the perspective that this self-centered account lacks. Agent, Kim Witherspoon.
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Booklist
Crimmins' husband, Alan, suffered a traumatic brain injury in a speedboat crash. This book tells the stories of Alan's slow and irregular return to a reasonably normal existence; of the changing relationships involved, especially that of Cathy and the Crimmins' daughter, Kelly; and of how an HMO impeded a patient's treatment and recovery by misguided attempts at cost cutting. The contrast between the Canadian helicopter trip after Alan's injury and the HMO's refusal to jet him from Canada to Philadelphia graphically illustrates the difference between the Canadian and U.S. medical systems. Flare-ups of anger and impulsiveness created major problems, including the low point when Alan savagely kicked Kelly, and make for blistering reading. Alan's progress, however, was remarkable, the result of scientifically minded, deeply caring physicians and nurses in Canada, where the accident occurred, and in the U.S. Alan eventually returned to work part-time in law and banking, though some of his problems remained. Despite not glossing over appalling details, this is an optimistic book. William Beatty
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

Customer Reviews

Cynical, Thoughtful and Scary
Crimmon's book was heart-wrenching to read. The story of her husband's TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) and the after effects of it on her life, his life and their daughter have to be read to be understood. I can't do it justice. She keeps a good sense of humor throughout the book but there is certainly an underlying cynical and bitter tone throughout. Not that I can blame her. It's real. It's life and a it ain't pretty. Personally, after reading this I literally wanted to make all my loved ones wear helmets each day after reading about the hell that TBI can put a family through.

Sincere and heartfelt account ... but raises a few questions
An honest telling of head injury and what family will experience.

I was shocked at what her daughter, Kelly, was exposed to - I have since read that the author now regrets this. Rehab is NO PLACE for children - or an endless stream of friends. I am sad that her husband's privacy was taken away in order to project 'normalcy' or the authors belief in emotional honesty. She should have protected her husband and her daughter. THIS is the time when you close the door to the world outside and tend to your family - as best you can.

I feel for the author. How quickly the nurses/non-doctors put forth a 'professional opinion' about brain injury. As I often say: Everybody wants to be a doctor, nobody want to go to medical school. You have to see brain injury over a long span of time, which is years and decades. A nurse who sees them admitted and discharged knows next to nothing, unless personally affected.

The beginning of the story was confusing to me because the marriage had so little intimacy. The parents were 2 ships in the night and then they had a child. This little girl was utterly alone through a waking nightmare. I hope she finds the support that she will need as she grows up.

Eventually, the author acknowledges her lack of connection to husband and child and explains herself in a way that is somewhat satisfying.

I appreciate her honesty in the discussion on disinhibition. You can count on it happening and it's real hard to explain to people - especially when you have to.

Worth reading, though disturbing in ways the author may not have intended.

wonderful book
We read this book for book club and we all loved it. Only now I understand what my cousin and his family have gone through after he had an bicycle accident and was in a coma for three days. The writer clearly describes the pain and anguish she and her daughter went through. I admire her absolute commitment to her husband and getting him back on his feet and back to a "regular" life. This is a great and informational book to read for everybody who comes into contact with a person with brain injury.