 | Dualit 4-Slice Toaster, Red
Buy new: $228.00 I would maybe purchase this if it made toast taste like cheesecake, but this is not the world we live in.
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 | Lello 4080 Musso Lussino 1.5-Quart Ice Cream Maker, Stainless
Buy new: $699.00 The advantage of this over $25 ice cream makers is that it self-refrigerates, saving you the precious three seconds it takes to put a bucket in the freezer.
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 | High Society Hounds Luxury Pet Bed by SoSadie : Size 24 INCH : Style WINDSOR
If I bought this for my cat, he'd roll around in an old pizza box, just to mock me. I would deserve it.
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 | Electrolux EL-520 Trilobite Robotic Vacuum
If you're going to put your tiny vaccum cleaner way out of everyone's price range, it's sort of ominous to name it after a long-extinct fossil.
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 | Apple iPod shuffle 512 MB White (1st Generation) OLD MODEL
Buy new: $76.69 / Used from: $20.00 If you're going to go for a ghetto iPod, there are better options than this.
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 | Keurig B50 Gourmet Single-Cup Brewing System
Buy used from: $129.00 $150 and it makes a *single* cup of coffee. By the way, you can only use their own coffee in it. Also, the coffee is haunted. Just kidding, I can't back that up.
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 | Mosquito Magnet Defender Mosquito Trap MM4000
Buy new: $252.89 Apparently the "Mosquito Magnet" attracts mosquitoes by spewing CO2. Can't you just pay a dumb guy $5 to exhale a lot?
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