Product Description

This book reveals the origin of self-hate, how self-hate works, how to identify it, and how to go beyond it. It provides examples of some of the forms self-hate takes, including taking blame but not credit, holding grudges, and trying to be perfect, and explores the many facets of self-hate, including its role in addiction, the battering cycle, and the illusion of control. After addressing these factors, it illustrates how a meditation practice can be developed and practiced in efforts to free oneself from self-hating beliefs.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #15580 in Books
• Published on: 2001-10-01
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 264 pages

Features

• ISBN13: 9780971030909
• Condition: NEW
• Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
• Click here to view our Condition Guide and Shipping Prices

About the Author
Cheri Huber is the author of 19 books, including When You're Falling, Dive and Time-Out for Parents. She founded the Mountain View Zen Center in Mountain View, California, and the Zen Monastery Practice Center in Murphys, California, and teaches in both communities. She travels widely and often, leading workshops and retreats around the United States and abroad, most recently in Costa Rica and Italy. She founded Living Compassion in 2003, a nonprofit group comprised of There Is Nothing Wrong with You Retreats (based on the book); Global Community for Peace: The Assisi Peace Project; The Africa Vulnerable Children Project; and Open Air Talk Radio, her weekly call-in radio show originating from Stanford University. She lives in Murphys, California.

Customer Reviews

Life Changing
We all do it (or did it at one time)...we all believe in the voices that criticize ourselves. Those voices pound our self-worth down and build-up our fears. This book is about the first step in discovering your true and powerful self -- that person you know you could be if the chains would just come off; the person who brings joy to the lives of those around you. It's all about replacing that fear and hate with love...Love for yourself.

If you find yourself in a vicious cycle of commit -> stress & try -> fail -> self-battery -> resolution -> commit. You can now know how to step off the treadmill and step into your personal joy.

This book changed my life.

Was there some great secret of life in it? Nope, not really. Was there some Tony Robbins-style empowerment formula? Not at all.

This book simply allowed me to sit still a moment and look straight into the face of my greatest enemy: my hateful-self. That person was constantly telling me all these lies about how I "wasn't good enough" or "wouldn't be happy until..." Cheri led me through the realization that I am worthy of being loved right now: faults and all. The first step to making lasting change in anything is telling the truth about how it is right now (i.e. accepting the current reality). How can you make lasting change in yourself until you evict the lier?

Cheri's book is an easy read. She is keeps it real simple. This is clearly a work from the heart.

If this book were $1,000, I'd *still* recommend it (or recommend you borrow it! ;D).

"In loving kindness."
Equal parts Zen and self help, this 233-page book examines how we have been conditioned to punish ourselves, and teaches us how to look deeply beyond that conditioning into our own good nature. It is about letting go of those voices that tell us we are bad, wrong and inadequate long enough for us to catch a glimpse of who we really are (p. ii). In another book, Zen teacher Cheri Huber compares self-hate to a parasite. "It steals your time, your joy, your good feeling about yourself," she writes in SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL (2000). "It steals your life" (p. 21).

In this loosely-organized book ("kind of like life"), Huber says, "something is wrong with you is not the voice of your Heart, God, True Nature" (p. 110). Rather it is the voice of social conditioning that teaches us as children to stop looking to ourselves in order to know what is so for us, and to begin looking to others--parents, teachers, friends, lovers, spouses, "Jesus or the Buddha or God--all'out there'," in order to know what is right (pp. ii-iii). Social conditioning teaches us "to assume there is something wrong with us, to look for the flaws, to judge them when we find them, to hate ourselves for having them, to punish ourselves until we eradicate them" (p. 102). It does not teach us "to love ourselves for our goodness, to appreciate ourselves for who we are, to trust ourselves, to have confidence in our abilities, to look to our heart for guidance" (p. 102). Huber encourages us to be suspicious of any voice "inside or outside that says, 'there is something wrong with you'" (p. 50).

Huber acknowledges it takes courage to look deeply beyond our self-criticism. "To sit still in compassionate acceptance is all that is required," she says (p. 85). Written with wisdom and clarity, Huber's book is an excellent guide for that inner journey.

G. Merritt

If I could keep only one book, this would be it.
Forget the corny self-help-sounding title. If you're not satisfied with yourself or your life, then get this book, and read it with an open mind. If you are seeking more compassion, love, or peace in your life, this may be helpful also. It is an excellent, incredible book.

If you would like this book but don't think you can afford it, let me know, I might be able to help.