Product Description

An elegant and evocative book for adopted children to open the birthparent and adoption dialog between parent and child.

Many adult adoptees have gone through life wanting to ask questions about their birthparents, but felt the thoughts they have might make their parents uncomfortable. Then, these questions have remained unasked and unanswered. "We See the Moon" opens the adoption dialog at an early age by allowing the questions in your child's heart to be asked and discussed, creating the foundation for conversations to come.

This is a story written from the child's perspective, asking the questions that dwell in their hearts about their birthparents...What do you look like? Where are you now? Do you think of me? It will help children use the moon as a private tool to connect with a family that is always with them in their hearts.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #177834 in Books
• Published on: 2003-01-15
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Hardcover
• 32 pages

Review
It beautifully captures both the joy and the sadness of adoption. A helpful addition to children's adoption literature. -- Susan Caughman, Founder FCC, Publisher, Adoptive Families Magazine

It is a beautiful book to empower parents and children to talk about adoption issues and open a lifelong dialog. -- Jane Brown, MSW, Editorial Board, Adoptive Families Magazine

This book is a feast for the eyes and the heart, also insightful and wise–quite an extraordinary combination. -- Adam Pertman, Executive Director Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institution

We love this focused, refined, easy to identify with, and timeless book filled with the hopeful message of being connected. -- PACT, An Adoption Alliance, January 2003

From the Publisher
This book has received extensive praise from parents who have read it to their children, commenting on how this has opened up channels of communication for them. While the images present with the text are from China, the sentiments expressed in We See the Moon are universal for all those who were adopted, regardless of country of origin. It also is not a book that will be outgrown. Adoptees at many stages in life have been touched by this book.

About the Author
Carrie Kitze is the owner of an award winning packaging and strategic marketing consulting firm where she has written for a variety of media for the last 15 years. The adoptive mother of two daughters, she is active in adoption affairs. This book came from listening to adult adoptees and hearing what her own daughters might say.

Customer Reviews

The moon is always there, even when it can't be seen...
This powerful book designed for pre-teen children (adopted from China, other countries or domestically) begins with a poem about the Moon, the refrain of which is "please let the light that shines on me/shine on the one I love.

The author uses the Chinese family festival of the Moon to anchor the illustrations to her text and subtext. This is to enable and empower the adopted child in building a link between her two worlds and families, with the Moon high above becoming the spiritual as well as physical "light that shines on me and the one I love".

Many adoptive families find it hard to choose the right minute for showing their child that it is OK both to feel hurt by and yet still love their birth-family. The book achieves this both by the quality of the illustrations (showing how life IS in China at Moon time) and the easy richness of child-suited sparse but elastic text). Each one-liner of text carries with it questions - and a whole subset of questions which are ready to escape from the initial questions- that the child can ask. Parents and child can read together, read separately, it's of no matter. What matters is that the issue of love and honour of the past is brought into the safety of the adoptive family. For children the word "love" is means connection. The book allows this; and with this foundation the child can later go on to deal with ALL the other powerful emotions that come with losing birthfamily but gaining an adoptive one.

In addition to the text of the book, if that were not enough richness, EMK press presents a free Parent Guide to download from their website. This guide is written by the formidable social worker and writer/presenter of children's therapeutic activities, Jane Brown. Here, Jane underscores from her professional experience the NEED for children to be permitted connections to their past while IN their present family: fail them in this, and the child doesn't grow "whole".

I was personally overwhelmed by the wistful childishness of some of the text .... The child affirms the magic of the moon and wonders if her mother is "looking now?" I loved the positive that the child affirms her happiness in her new family and hopes her first family can sense that.

I loved the Jinshan illustrations. This painting academy specialises in naïve art, so the illustrations are both friendly-foreign, and entirely apt in their childlike perspective, a myopically child-centric view of the world. Here I use myopic, or short-sighted, in the sense that the child is ultra-focused on the aspects of living that matter.

I questioned whether the book would work for all kids, because some children, and I am adoptive mother to two such kids, don't have easy reactions to easy solutions for connections to loss. Was the book appealing to MY need for my children to be happy here, was I ignoring their need to know the harder facts of how they came to be abandoned? Was looking at the connection of love far too simplistic?

So I handed it to "the experts". The book's been tugged-of-war over, it's begged for and they are up looking for the Moon when they should be asleep. My children (aged 3 and 7) took it to their hearts... I am not sure exactly why, but I suspect that my children KNOW books are special. So ,for them, to hear things in a book that make OK hard feelings is "Double Happiness".

This is just one of those books that resounds and displays those essentials for children: symbols which elicit trust and peace in their quest for answers.

And I love it too. The moon is always there, even when it can't be seen. As are my children's connection to their first families.

Korean Quarterly Review by an adult Korean Adoptee
Even as a child, memories of my past from long ago and thousands of miles away would catch me off guard. I might have been playing with Barbie dolls with my friends, and suddenly, I would remember, walking along in a dusty, yellow marketplace with my father, along the busy streets of Seoul. But it was mostly at nighttime, when the world was asleep, that my mind reverted to my childhood, a different childhood, a life that seemed to belong to someone else.

Whether we travel in our own quiet spaces of our mind to a place that was once our home or physically trace our paths back to where our lives began, for adoptees, the journey is one that many of us make. Such journeys are the subject of We See the Moon.

Author Carrie Kitze beautifully captures the simple, yet haunting thoughts that many adoptees may share. Her writing is fleeting and poetic, like clouds, that float across our minds with questions of one's past:

I was born
In a faraway land,
of parents
With faces in the shadows.
Where are you now?

For many adoptees, the person who gave birth to us seems like a complete stranger, so different from us in every way. But all the differences in the world are bridged by the metaphor of the moon, which as the title of the book evokes, is constant and comforting. The moon connects us to our past and present, and no matter where we are, we see the same moon.

All I need is to look
at the moon in the night sky
and think of you.

The simple text leaves wide spaces for thought on each page, and each phrase or question is echoed beautifully by the colorful and mesmerizing Jinshan Peasant Paintings. As described in the book, these paintings were first painted by older women skilled in various folk arts that had been passed down through generations in Jinshan County near Shanghai, China. The primitive looking paintings, in which tempera paint is mixed with chalk, are simple, bright and childlike, each depiction carefully telling its own story.

We See the Moon is a book to be shared, to open conversations, and to delicately unfold the questions that many adoptees secretly hold. By creating this beautiful book, Kitze has confirmed for all of us that although the journey to our past feels lonely, it can be shared with loved ones. Her carefully chosen questions and phrases may evoke memories or for others, lead to more unanswered questions.

This review first appeared in Korean Quarterly, Winter 2003/2004 www.koreanquarterly.org

Profound
Your adopted child can be from anywhere ... and you and your family will be able to relate deeply to this book's messages. The author uses simple language to elegantly express tender feelings of enduring curiosity and loss in adoption, even as it acknowledges the security of the adopted home. My 6-year-old was relieved to hear words describing how she felt. She seemed even more gratified as we read it together to know I was hearing how she feels and it is safe for us to talk about these topics. This book is amazing in the way it communicates the naturalness of feeling sadness, and offers a way to find comfort by connecting to birthparents through the moon, in words children can easily understand. Best of all, it reinforces an ability to love both sets of parents.