Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #62140 in Books
• Published on: 1998-11
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 272 pages

From Library Journal
When a child is adopted as a toddler, his needs and those of his adoptive family are different from the needs seen in infant or school-age adoptions. Yet few resources are available to deal with these special issues. In this work, Hopkins-Best, a child development expert and mother of a child adopted as a toddler, provides a guidebook for those considering toddler adoption or those already struggling with its special challenges. She discusses at length strategies for dealing with issues such as a grieving toddler or attachment disorder. She also explains normal toddler development and possible variances in the adopted toddler. The appendix provides a wonderful list of resources. Perhaps most valuable are the anecdotes of both successes and failures from other toddler adoptive families. An important addition to all adoption collections.?KellyJo Houtz Griffin, Auburn, Wash.
Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review
Toddler Adoption is a resource designed to help adopting parents and placing professionals involved in adoptions of children in the unique developmental stage from ages one to three, usually referred to as toddlerhood. Books focusing on parenting an adopted infant, and those written for the special needs adopters of school-aged children contain little of relevance for those adopting a toddler. These children are up on their feet and walking, and have achieved cognitive growth providing a store of remembered life experiences with caregivers and age-peers to whom they have probably become attached, but the language and cognitive skills of toddler-aged children are still too unsophisticated to allow a toddler to make use of the therapies that can help smooth transitions and deal with losses. Toddler Adoption fills this gap admirably. Toddler Adoption is essential reading for anyone considering the adoption of a boy or girl falling within the one to three year age bracket. -- Midwest Book Review

From the Publisher
This is a book about the journey of building family through adoption of a child between the ages of one and three. The journey begins long before the child arrives, and continues indefinitely. This book explores the decision to adopt, the preparation for adopting and the adjustment to adoption of a toddler.... The author discusses both the exquisite joys of toddler adoption and challenges that the majority of families will probably encounter. This is a "can do" book that is intended to encourage toddler adoption for parents who are stable, mature and ready for the challenge and journey of their life!

Customer Reviews

A very valuable resource for parents of adopted toddlers
This book is a practical, upbeat guide for parents who have adopted a child who is old enough to carry with them the weight of past experiences and the loss of former attachments (or the hurt of lack of attachments) yet are not old enough to express their emotions or memories in a way that can help their new parents help them. Hopkins-Best has helped unravel some of the mysteries that come with toddlers with a "past". I found her approach extremely helpful with our Romanian son adopted recently at the age of 34 months. I learned that some of the eating problems were actually rooted in attachment problems and that I had been handling the outbursts at the table in exactly the wrong way. Within days of changing my reaction his behavior improved dramatically. I wish I had read the book before I adopted a toddler, but I'm glad I read it soon after or we may have had a much longer struggle with attachment. I would consider this "required reading" for anybody looking to adopted a child over the age of one year.

I'm Glad I found this book
Being able to watch for attachment and bonding issues really helped all of us become a family. The information on adopting a toddler, the agency gave us was miniscule in comparison to what is avaliable in this book .
We knew we might end up with a Toddler eventho our child was assigned to us when she was 9 months old. She was 23 months old when we got her home! I think the author prepares you for the worst that could happen in toddler adoption. I hope she comes out with a 2nd edition including more happy stories. Our daughter transitioned better than my highest expectations. My expectations were lowered after reading Toddler Adoption. All in all that was a good thing.
I sometimes wonder if being prepared changed our handling of situations, thus allowing us to facillitate her transition and bonding.
Because of the information in this book, We choose to travel to pick up our daughter and, we were better prepared for the "rejection phase".
This book was useful in stopping overbearing well wishers from becoming annoying. I actually handed this book to my neighbor open to the section on bonding, while she was being intrusive the first week our daughter was home.
It was a back up to my words of "no you may not feed her".
It also helped both sets of grandparents prepare for the inital visit with the newest addtion to the family.
Read the book, but don't think "This will happen to me". Rather think these things could happen but I can shorten the amount of time they take.

Very negative
Well, if you were thinking of adopting a toddler, this book should certainly cure you of that idea. If you already have your paperwork in, do yourself a favor and read this book AFTER the child comes home. I was looking for a book that would have practical solutions to everyday problems..for example: What are the best ways to ease the child into daycare? What have some other parents done to solve behavioral problems such as biting? How do we help build relationships amongst siblings? This book lists an awful lot of problems, but is very scant on both solutions and anecdotes.One would get the idea that most adopted toddlers are an absolute mess (in fact, it suggests that it they're NOT a mess, then there's something definitely wrong with them). When you announce your intent to adopt, you're going to get enough nay-saying from your "friends", family, co-workers (and complete strangers)! You don't need this book to add to that!