Product Description

Picking up where "The Rules" left off, this book addresses such topics as: how to deal with long distance relationships; how to win back an ex-boyfriend; and--most importantly--how to make sure the engagement leads to marriage. The book also answers the ten most frequently-asked questions about "The Rules".

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #377295 in Books
• Published on: 1998-09-01
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Mass Market Paperback
• 224 pages

Customer Reviews

These books are not as horrible as you think
As someone who considers herself a highly intelligent, well-educated individual, I originally turned up my nose at these "manipulative" Rules, claiming, after having read the first book, that they would only work on a certain, superficial type of man. But let me tell you what I've discovered - acting as if you like yourself and your life and that you are just as happy without a man as with one is the only way to ever really find happiness *with* one! Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider have been slammed for writing these books, when in actuality the message they are trying to get across is: "stop being so pathetic, stop sitting around daydreaming about how some guy will make your life perfect, because when you think that way, you're *bound* to end up looking needy and desperate!" I think the reason these books offended so many "feminists" is because even feminists act this way! Even the most intelligent, intellectual, well-educated women in the world doodle their first name with the dream guy's last name, daydream about their wedding, etc...yet hate it about themselves. The bottom line is, don't knock "The Rules" books just because they appear calculating and manipulative. Granted, there are brainless bimbos out there who follow the book to the letter without ever getting the greater message, whose only goal is getting a rich husband. But these books are also great "how-to" guides for those of us who *know* we have to stop being doormats and that we have a tendency to rationalize it by saying we're just "being open and honest". I also recommend "Men Like Women Who Like Themselves".

A Clue for the Clueless
I have met, chased, been dumped twice by and finally caught by Mr Right. The first two times we dated, things would go well and then I'd start analysing and get clingy (as I did with all my relationships.) The first time he called the third time we dated (we dated and stopped dating THREE TIMES over four years)I had a copy of The Rules in front of me-- strangely opened to the page that said something to the effect of, "Don't be too excied when he calls. . . Get off the phone first-- you are busy and have a life!" I considered it destiny, said it was great hearing from him but that I was only home for a few minutes but had to run as I had an appointment. He asked me for dinner that weekend-- I said I was busy on Friday (I didn't tell him that I was doing laundry!)and he tied me down for Saturday. (Very Rules of me!)

I enjoyed that date, and I wanted it to go on for forever. But the Rules said no-- end the evening first. I told him I was teaching Sunday school the next morning and had to be home by midnight for my beauty rest.

He dropped me off and met me and my kids at the church the next morning. The date DID go on for Forever-- we married three months later.

He later told me that when he called he had been thinking of me-- I was a nice, single mom with three terrific kids and he had decided that I was intellectually great as a friend but that I was too fragile for a romance. He planned on sowing the seeds for a gradual friendship to be built again, but that he was shocked that as needy as I had been, I was suddenly doing other things. He really liked this new woman and wanted to know me better, and he was suddenly having to work to get my attention! As recommended in the books, I decided to not call him if I didn't hear from him-- he didn't call me once for three days and I had made certain to make plans for the next weekend, so oh-well. I waited for him to make the moves. He did. If I had plans with the kids, he even offered to join us-- and he paid for all of us just to be "taking care of me." He worked a shift job the first two years after we wed, and I was always getting called every night he was gone. At a Christmas party everyone said how proud of me he was as he bragged about my community involvment and how he couldn't wait to come home to me. The Rules I & II advised me on how to act under difficult circumstances and I did them-- it is hard to not vomit your feelings out when you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, but timing was crucial and as a result, he was happier and we couldn't wait for one another.

HE will buy our daughters copies of both for their thirteenth birthdays and to encourage them to be active women with more than romance on their minds. Even when the hormones are screaming that a boy is the be-all/end-all, he'll have more to advise them with as far as saying, "You are worth more than this."

Read the book.
I don't think The Rules should be followed like a Bible, but there are some very valid points-- about 75% in my estimation-- in there. The media, as usual, likes to quote out of context to devalue the entire book. For example, the media hypes the rule that a woman should not accept a date for Saturday after Wednesday. True, the book cites the theory that the woman who agrees to a last-minute date will enable a man to use her as a last resort for that weekend when the women he truly likes turn him down, and he is less likely to respect her because of it. However, the book also makes the valid point that a woman should be busy and fulfilled with hobbies outside of dating. Not only will this make her less desperate for a man, but she'll be more interesting to date because of her activities. Therefore, a woman should be active enough that she has at least a vague idea of other things to do for the weekend if the telephone does not ring by Thursday, so she'll be telling the truth

when she tells a guy who asks her on Saturday afternoon for a Saturday night date. Appropos to this, in college I was puzzled when some men in the dorms labled various women "Karen" even when their names were otherwise. Women got this title by being sure-thing dates when the women the men really wanted to date were busy, and "Karens" rarely got to meet a guy's parents. One day I learned why these females were called Karen. It rhymes with Guarantee. Read The Rules II.