I'm tempted to avoid mentioning this, since it seems to be fading into obscurity, but since I hate it more than just about any movie I've ever seen...gruesome, nihilistic, homophobic, vile, pointless.

I own this goof: I read the reviews and knew what I was getting into, but I was just too curious, especially since the book is nigh-unfilmable. Ta-da! A movie that's nigh- unwatchable, especially for those who dislike insects. Unrelettingly disturbing, ultimately pointless & nauseating.

Hey, here's an idea! Let's take "Oliver Twist" and make it a modern-day hustler story, keeping all of Dickens' squalidness and toughness but removing every shred of humanity and the hard-won happy ending! We'll just make it even worse! You'll feel cheated and depressed! You'll want to kill yourself! You'll...hey, where are you going?

This is semi-amusing drek for about 90+ minutes or so (especially the infamous "dolphin scene"), and Gina Gershon is deliciously evil. Then there's an ugly rape scene and the movie plummets into the sewer for the remainder of its running time, and it's not even fun garbage anymore. (Elizabeth Berkeley gives a sensational performance in "Roger Dodger," so I blame the director for her work here.)

I went to this expecting a creepy masterpiece of suggestion and terror. Instead, I got three bickering morons who don't know how to walk out of a scraggly, thinly-treed forest. Oh, and LEAVES! BENT TWIGS! DEAR GOD, THE HORRROR!

So much to choose from when David Lynch goes wrong! "Mulholland Drive" is more incomprehensible, "Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me" more depressing, but there's something about this disaster that lingers in the mind--despite the repeated attempts at self-lobotomy.

Fans of Schaedenfreude, nirvana! (Look it up.) Clever set pieces and sight gags try to paper over what's basically a major jerk (DeNiro) humiliating and torturing a dweeb (Stiller) for 2 hours. As a Theater of Cruelty exercise, fascinating; as a movie, leaves a sour, nasty taste in the mouth.

Every now and then, there's a movie that "everyone" loves, and just leaves me cold. This one left me sub-zero Kelvin. Hated everything about it, right down to the cheat ending, which basically revealed most of what you've suffered through to be a lie. Coma-inducing.

I'm a big fan of "Blade Runner," but this OTHER Philip K. Dick work is a nasty, unpleasant, illogical, ultra-violent bucket of swill. Amazingly, some folks apparently regard it fondly; then again, some people eat cockroaches.

I don't think there's ever been another film I've seen where I literally felt every minute tick by, and thought, "I could be doing anything--anything--else with my life, and it would be better than watching this." All this, plus Rick Ducummon, the most annoying actor ever.