Product Description

Written with the compassionate language that people have come to rely upon and expect from these proven relationship experts, this book goes beyond an explanation of the condition to help men and women avoid the self-destructive permanence of remaining with people incapable of loving anyone but themselves.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #325110 in Books
• Published on: 2005-03-25
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Hardcover
• 288 pages

Features

• ISBN13: 9781590770771
• Condition: NEW
• Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
• Click here to view our Condition Guide and Shipping Prices

From Publishers Weekly
Christina, a successful 38-year-old real estate agent, was very happy with Len, who initially overwhelmed her with compliments, care and concern; once she had fallen in love with him, he suddenly began to insist that his needs and plans and schedules come first. Christina was in love with a narcissist—and in their new guide, the authors of Men Who Can't Love tell how to recognize such a beast, the dangers of loving one and strategies for ending a relationship with a person who always puts "me" first. The authors point out that we all may exhibit narcissistic tendencies at times, but the true narcissist is incapable of a give-and-take relationship. The authors acknowledge that they are writers, not therapists, and base their theories on anecdotes, written in very accessible language, rather than on academic research. Many interviews were conducted with both men and women completely seduced by narcissists, who can, according to the authors, be extremely charismatic. Carter and Sokol detail behavioral cues that can identify a narcissist and look at the causes of narcissism, chief among them being raised by narcissistic parents. Carter and Sokol provide a number of coping skills for those involved with narcissists, but their advice boils down to taking care of yourself first and seeking outside support.
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About the Author
Steven Carter lives in Los Angles, California. Julia Sokol lives in Bristol, Rhode Island.

Customer Reviews

This book changed my life!
I now understand why all my relationships with men have ended badly and why I am continually hurt. I keep falling in love with toxic narcissists. The book explained to me what I have been doing and how to stop doing it.

This book was so good and so life changing that I sent a copy to my sister and have recommended the book to friends who have had disasterous relationships with men. As for me, six months ago I canceled a wedding and walked away from a man who I now understand was a toxic narcissist. Until I read the book, I could not stop weeping I was so wounded by his actions. Now, I UNDERSTAND that it was nothing I did or can ever change. He has a personality disorder.

I recommend this book for every woman (and man) who has ever had a romantic relationship with a selfish, hurtful person. You don't have to keep doing it. Read the book, understand, protect yourself, and be happy!

Comprehensive and objective
Caught in a triangle with the love of your life? Can't figure out why he is so happy with you one day and with another woman the next? If you never heard of narcissism and are not in a happy relationship, read this book. It is an easy read that translates the difficult to understand jargon about a serious and not uncommon personality disorder into common language set in the context of partner relationships. What is lacking is help on distinguishing from "normal" levels of selfishness and self-centeredness and the toxic kind that invariably leads to egregious emotional abuse. The subject is mentioned but not really addressed. At any level, narcissism is something to avoid. At the toxic level, it is time to bail. This book is a guide to spotting the toxic narcissist that may be breaking your heart. It will free you to give up and get out.

The best of its kind.
I've read every book there is on narcissism, and this is the best. It captured my experience to a "t" and offered the most comprehensive and detailed information (without being clinical or boring) on all facets of the disorder. It was such a relief to have a name (and description) for the incredible insanity I lived through with my narcissistic partner. I especially loved the story about the man who lovingly made a sandwich for his girlfriend at a party. Anyone who's been involved with a narcissist can relate to the twisted truth of what actually happened when the story unfolded. Fascinating stuff and a real lifesaver. If you want to understand how you got involved with this type of person -- and how to avoid it in the future -- this is the book for you.