Product Description

Just what is a politically incorrect wife? She is a woman who is married to her husband and not to popular American culture. The politically incorrect wife does not buy into the stifling modern-day thinking that says, "Look out for number one. Treat your husband no better than he treats you." Instead, she cultivates a joyful marriage using transformational spiritual principles. As formerly politically correct wives with miserable marriages, popular speakers and authors Nancy Cobb and Connie Grigsby lead readers confidently beyond the picket lines of the politically correct -- into a warm, rewarding marriage.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #475588 in Books
• Published on: 2003-01-01
• Released on: 2003-01-10
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 300 pages

From Publishers Weekly
For Christian women who feel they're at wits end with their marriage, this matrimony manual offers straightforward advice on how to set aside the ways of the self-centered, modern world and become a godly wife by putting Jesus at the forefront of the relationship. Reminiscent of talk show host Dr. Phil with a biblical twist (and with a philosophy not unlike that of Laura Doyle's controversial The Surrendered Wife), the book presents hard and fast teachings to transform the "politically correct" wife into one who submits to "God's scriptural 'job description' for wives." The principles of politically incorrect wives include learning to forgive, respecting and honoring one's husband and putting him first, even before the children. Cobb (a church director of women's ministries in Omaha, Neb.) and Grigsby (coauthor of How to Get Your Husband to Talk to You) present advice that could help any Christian marriage-the chapter on forgiveness and acceptance, for example, shows how bitterness can be released and destructive patterns changed. Making the home marriage-centered rather than child-centered, the authors maintain, will keep children from becoming narcissistic adults with inflated egos. With so many well-meaning but specific directives, however, the guide doesn't give the reader room to explore her own feelings, and unless she feels consistently godly, these rules may serve only as a band-aid covering deeper wounds or problems.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

About the Author
Nancy Cobb is a popular speaker at women's retreats. She led a Bible study of over 500 women for four years in Raleigh, North Carolina, and has previously worked on the team of Anne Graham Lotz, daughter of Billy Graham, in teaching seminars to women at the Billy Graham Training Center. She is the Leader of Women's Ministries at Christ Community Church, a congregation of over 5,000, and spends much of her time mentoring younger women. She and her husband, Ray, have four grown children and live in Omaha, Nebraska.

Customer Reviews

More equal than I thought
Inspite of the fact that I believe in mutual submission and not authority submission in marriage, this book had a lot of admirable points. Although these authors believe in the complimentarian model of marriage, it's undeniable that they have a better balance of the idea of submission in a marriage than many of the over-the-top authors I've come across.

There are some weaknesses, of course; along with the usual worn-out authority issue is the myth that marriage will fall apart if neither partner takes the reins. The authors never say this, but they do give society and the military as examples and ask us to imagine what it would be like if no authority was involved in either system. They then try to use marriage as the same sort of system, implying that it too will fall apart without authority. Please, guys! We're talking about TWO people here, not the army or society, the former which is built on authority and the latter which contains criminals and other low-lifes. If two people who love each other commit to each other, there's actually a slim chance things will work just fine! God is the only authority needed. If you bristle like a porcupine anytime you read/hear the words "you are under your husband's authority", you'll have to take this book with a grain of salt if you decide to read it. Inspite of the fact that I bristle like said porcupine when I come across this idea of marital principle and this analogy of the authors very much exasperated me, I forced myself to go over this book's points anyway and came out more impressed than I originally thought I'd be. You could say I started with a scowl and actually ended with a grin.

There are three main things about this book that earned my respect. One, while it says repeatedly that submission has to do with authority, it not only refrains from harping on it, but also gives a separate defintion of submission. At one point, the literal definition of submission that the book gives is "cooperating with a person you love in the name of Christ". Naturally, I totally agree with that. This definition did confuse me a bit, though, because just a couple of paragraphs later, almost in the same breath, the authors once more referred to the authority definiton. Does this mean the authors were contradicting themselves and aren't really sure what their definition of submission is? My guess, after some thought on the matter, was no. I think what it really means is that the authors have a far better balance of submission than other authors do.

I also appreciated the sensible advice they gave to wives whose husbands wanted them to sin. As any normal Christian would, they advised the wife to refuse in such a case. What impressed me, though, was the fact that they didn't tell wives to refrain from submitting ONLY if the husband's request was sinful. Many times, I've come across authors who advise wives to submit even if they're really uncomfortable with the idea, as long as the husband isn't asking them to sin. Grigsby, however, openly acknowledges the fact that wives are often not comfortable with submitting even to non-sinful requests and rather than telling wives to do so anyway, she told them to seek advice elsewhere first.

The third winning point of the book was Grigsby's tone. Most authors on the subject of authoritarian submission manage to either sound sickly sweet and unbelievably happy (Elizabeth George) or incredibly judgemental and sharp-tongued (Nancy Wilson). Grigsby does neither and actually sounds like a flesh and blood woman; her tone is friendly, energetic, and quite frankly a breath of fresh air in comparison to those other authors. I felt like I could actually have a two-way conversation with her in real life without being patronized.

Like I said, I don't believe in marital authoritarian submission. However, if you do and you are earnestly seeking a book to help you, this is definitely the one to get! The tone is fresh, the advice is sensible, and the author has the best balance of submission that I've ever seen on this side of the issue (and I'm a very harsh critic, believe me!) Two stars for handling this sensitive issue so well, and another star for addressing the reader like she's an actual person.

In a Culture of Feminism, Practical, Biblical Submission
This is a wonderful book for the Christian wife who wants to put into practice the biblical command to be subject to her own husband, but doesn't really know what that LOOKS like in a day-to-day fashion.

Contrary to another reviewer's comments, this is not a return to the 50's or an evil plot from the Religious Right, and no where do the authors promote women staying in abusive relationships. What they do advocate is right out of the scriptures, and is extrememly helpful to someone who wants to live by those scriptures despite what she is being told by the feminist culture around her.

A good reader makes the book good.
I have really enjoyed this book. I am a 23 year-old newlywed with a liberal Christian faith. I picked it up because I genuinely feel that contemporary popular culture dictates that it is necessary and inevitable to have a power struggle between spouses. I simply cannot live my married life this way, and this book piqued my interest.

I would say that there are a few sections which are over the top in the context of my denomination's teachings. I do believe that there are circumstances where a wife has to take a firmer stand than what they advocate. However, you can find that obliquely pointed to in their discussion of how a woman should not be complicit in their husband's sin (but they don't develop this thought as far as I believe is necessary). As I see it, if he beats you he is sinning, and passively staying and accepting that is being complicit in it. So you have to read the book with a critical eye and not be ready to blindly follow everything spelled out- but this is how you should read all books (particularly lifestyle-advice ones) anyway.

That said, there were many sections that offered practical lists of advice and realistic real-life examples. I laughed about the example of fruitlessly leaving a suitcase out where he might put it away and getting frustrated when he doesn't- this is the approach I would have (and still do at times) taken, but they just out and out say, basically, "put the suitcase away and be at peace with it". However, again, read critically and don't get too wrapped up in the book... these are two women's interpretations of the word of God as applied to how they imagine works in the household, not his words!!!

All this said, read it! Check it out and garner the pearls of wisdom out of it.