Product Description

Review

"You are a miserable excuse for a person if you don't buy this hilarious book. Bob Powers is some kind of comedy genius or something. Frankly, I'm scared." -Paul Feig, creator of the TV series "Freaks and Geeks" and author of "Superstud"

"There are page turners and then there are page turners. This wonderful, pathetic tale left me wanting more pages." -Zach Galifianakis, Humorist

"No one I know writes so funny and so sad at the same time better than Bob Powers. If you're willing to take a chance and jump into his twisted mind, you're in for a delicious, cringe-inducing treat. ...This book is like those great `Choose Your Own Adventure' books we read as kids, if the pain and soul-crushing responsibility of adulthood had infested the whole thing." -Bryan Tucker, writer for "Chappelle's Show" and "Saturday Night Live"

"As I read Bob Powers' `Just Make a Choice!' adventure, I endeavored to choose honestly, according to my own ethics and beliefs. Unfortunately, this resulted in babies being aborted, people being murdered, unspeakable debauchery and multiple dead-end jobs, just like my real life!" -John Roderick, lead singer/songwriter, The Long Winters

Book Description

Why Do All the Nice Girls End Up Getting Kidnapped and Held for Ransom?

In this book, YOU, the reader, are a thirtysomething part-time actor/full-time waiter suddenly caught up in a kidnapping. Julia, the girl you went out with last night, has been TAKEN HOSTAGE. What will you do? Will you go to the police and ask for help? Will you burst into the hideout, killing everyone in sight, then tell Julia that she shouldn't misinterpret this as some sort of big commitment? Or will you unplug your phone and just get really, really drunk? The choice is yours!

You awake to the sound of the phone ringing.

"Hello?"

You hear a man's voice. It is muffled. "We've got Julia."

"Wait, what do you mean?"

"We have kidnapped your girlfriend. If you ever want to see her again---"

"Whoa, she's not my girlfriend," you say. "I just met her. I mean, I had a good time with her and all, but I wanna take it slow with this one, I think."

"We understand," the voice says. "But she's new to the city, and presently, you're all she has. Give us fifty thousand dollars by tomorrow or we'll blow her head off."

If you want to go and ask your parents if you can borrow fifty thousand dollars, go to page 173.

If you want to have sex with your ex-girlfriend, consider getting back together with her, then think better of it, go to page 183.

BE VERY CAREFUL! You're directing the story and the CHOICES you make can result in MURDER, GRADUATE SCHOOL ENROLLMENT, TORTURE, MARRIAGE, POST-APOCALYPTIC SLAVERY, UNWANTED PREGNANCY, even TEMPING! It's YOUR STORY and YOUR LIFE. All you've got to do is decide which page you want to turn to.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #191538 in Books
• Published on: 2008-05-27
• Released on: 2008-05-27
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 240 pages

Review

About the Author

Customer Reviews

Ridiculously Perfect, and Perfectly Ridiculous
Bob Powers has written a hilarious and very adult version of the classic Choose Your Own Adventure type of book, skewering everything from dotcom mania to a Landmark Forum-type "personal development workshop." The latter advertises that "There is a GEYSER OF PERSONAL POTENTIAL waiting to burst out of you. Find out how to COAT THE WORLD with AN EXPLOSION OF YOU." As you try to figure out the best way for your hero, or, perhaps, anti-hero, to save his girlfriend (or, you know, not), who is being held by kidnappers for $50,000, Powers you to a sex club, an abortionist, 9/11 and beyond. He somehow manages to cram in all kinds of current events with a general sense of generational angst and relationship drama, all while you flip around madly trying to find the best ending. Except all the endings here are kindof messed up, and all the funnier for it.

I read all the time on the subway, and only rarely do I miss my stop because I'm so engrossed in a book. That happened with this one, so be forewarned.

More Powers Gold!!!
Great book. Very original and funny. Bob Powers unleashes his beautifully twisted arsenal of ideas in a Choose-Your-Own Adventure for adults.
I love this guy's stand-up, sketch comedy and books. He's a hilarious, genuine artist - one of NY's authentic voices who seems to never lack the kind of deliciously dark concepts that you wish didn't crack you up so hard.

Fun gimic, but not as fun as you want it to be.
I love the idea of a choose your own adventure book for adults and the theme of this book really appealed to me. That said, I wanted to read more of the humor and insights in the book, but the choose your own adventure format of the novel made it difficult for me to make sure I'd read every possible storyline. I think the story is something that many people in their 20's, 30's and even 40's can relate to, I'm just not sure there is enough story there for those who enjoy being immersed in a novel.