A farmer barters two pigs and a chicken for a girl, and gets more than he bargained for. The first Erindale Tale.

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Product Description

The farmer takes a waif... ----- When Gael bought Aramie, he presumed that they would just live together as friends, and that would be that. But he soon discovered that the dispirited girl who plodded behind her uncle’s wagon was actually a captivating young woman, and as she almost literally blossomed before his eyes, he found it more and more difficult to think of her as someone he couldn’t be interested in. And he couldn’t be interested in her. After all, he was old enough to be her father. More than old enough. And he hadn’t rescued her from her uncle, only to ruin her life, himself. He’d bought her to save her, and save her he would, no matter what it entailed…

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A warm, humorous tale of an unlikely romance, "Two Pigs and a Chicken" is a fairy tale in which the hero slays no dragons, lays low no villains, and performs no heroic deeds, save for perhaps the most important deed of all -- filling an empty heart with love and hope.

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Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #2944293 in Books
• Published on: 2004-07-13
• Released on: 2004-07-13
• Original language: English
• Binding: Paperback
• 336 pages

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
As the wagon started up, Gael noticed, for the first time, that there was a girl walking just behind the wagon, on the other side. She was a skinny thing, clad practically in rags, her hair dirty and matted, and her face drawn and gaunt. Somehow, he felt that he ought to know who she was, but she certainly didn’t look like anyone he’d ever seen.

"Sproule," he said, uncertainly.

Sproule stopped the wagon. "Yes, brother Gael?"

"Who’s the girl?"

Sproule looked at the girl, and then at Gael, a sly look transforming his face in a very unpleasant way.

"She’s m’ niece. My brother’s whelp."

Gael remembered, now. There had been a girl, left orphaned when her parents died, and Sproule descended on his brother’s property. It had been a very long time since he’d mixed with his neighbors, and he didn’t recall what she looked like, or even whether he’d ever seen her, but the appalling state that she was in spoke volumes about how much Sproule had neglected everything that he had inherited.

"She going to Donton with you?"

Sproule nodded. "If I can’t sell her off somewhere else, first. She don’t look like much, but she’s a good worker. Make someone a nice maid or some such, once she’s cleaned up a bit."

Gael was appalled by the crass simplicity of the statement. The girl was his brother’s child, for god’s sake, and all the villain cared about was whether he could wring some coin out of her. He wouldn’t even put it past him to take her all the way to Donton, and sell her into prostitution. Not that it was any of his business what people did with their things, or their relatives, but it pained him to see a young girl face such a future. A sudden impulse overcame him, and he casually nodded toward the girl.

"What do you want for her?"

Sproule’s face broke into what was undoubtedly the broadest grin that the fellow was capable of. "Ah, so I do have something you want."

"I didn’t say I necessarily wanted her. But if you’re selling her, I could use a hand around here." Sproule got down from the wagon, went over to the girl, and led her over to Gael, so that he could show her off better.

"She’s a lot stronger than she looks. Not much meat on her, but big boned."

Gael looked her over. The girl was as skinny as a rail. Even though a bit over five feet tall, he doubted that she weighed much over six stone.

"She looks like she’s been starved."

Sproule spread his hands, and shrugged. "She’s not been feeling well, and she’s lost some weight. I’m sure that now she’s better, she’ll be fit in no time."

Gael turned back to the girl, who had been standing, apparently oblivious to their conversation, with her face staring down into the dirt beneath her bare feet. He put one hand under her chin, and raised it, so that he could look at her eyes. He was surprised to see that they were nice eyes, dark eyes, with a certain fire in them, despite the downtrodden look of the rest of her, and that instead of lightly letting him look into them, she turned them away from him.

"I’ll give you a pig and a chicken for her," he said, rather dubiously.

"Four pigs and two chickens," Sproule replied. "She’s got skills, she has. She can cook, and sew, and she’d be a good bedmate, if you want one."

Gael’s nostrils flared at the fellow’s effrontery. He was an old man, nearly forty-two, and this girl couldn’t possibly be more than fifteen or sixteen. She might be of marriageable age, but the idea that he would force such a young thing into his bed was not only disgusting, but also an insult to him, and to all humanity. Still, if he was to save her, it was best not to upset Sproule, so he suppressed his feelings and continued to examine her.

Pulling her dress taut against her, he was hardly surprised, but still more than a bit distressed, to see how little there was of her inside it, and he noted that.

"She’s awfully small-breasted. If I were to take her, she’d not be likely to have enough milk for any children she bore."

"Well, you can always use goat’s milk to help a babe along," Sproule said, smoothly. "And as I said, she’s been sick. You feed her good for a little while, and I’m sure she’ll fill right out. And she’s a good age. Just sixteen. Old enough to marry, but young enough to know her place."

The girl started slightly at that, and Gael decided that Sproule must be exaggerating her age to try to make the sale, not that it made any difference to him.

"Two pigs, and a chicken. If I have to fatten her up, I can’t afford to pay much more."

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Customer Reviews

a man of many (cowboy) hats
as Jim Ostach once remarked, Two Pigs and a Chicken is "a remarkable story, endearing characters, and a wonderful ending." Jim couldn't have been more right. This enchanting tale of blue collared romance amidst chaotic domestica is filled with bathos peppered with hubris. Seligman massages romantic ideals like a husky Vietnamese Jane Austen. He is truly a master in command of such dazzling literary devices such as chiasmus. As a former student of Seligman's I can proudly assert that Seligman deftly blends assonance, alliteration and astronomy into a higher school of thought. His book goes where The Color Purple never could and where The Grapes of Wrath blundered. It's a dust bowl ballad for lovers of all civil war battles, from Shiloh to Bull Run and Antietam to Vicksburg. No conisseur is left behind. Seligman blessed with a fiery mane propels his passion for the universal plight of love in Two Pigs. This book is deceptively simple, tricking us to thinking it's comparable to the county fair and before you know it you're trapped inside a bonnet and chaps. It's like the strength of Orion, mighty and bold disappearing only to leave us waiting for more (Three Pigs and a Coop?????)

Update on the sequel(s)
Moira's story -- The Maiden All Forlorn -- previously intended as a 2005 sequel to Two Pigs and a Chicken, has been considerably altered and expanded, and is now planned as the first and third entries in a series of Erindale Tales. The first volume, still titled The Maiden All Forlorn, will be published in late 2007, and subsequent titles should appear at intervals of eight to twelve months. (Working titles for books whose plots are essentially complete are An Unsuitable Suit, A Change of Heart, Just Jamie, Poor Emily, and Blind Man's Bluff.)

A Note From The Author
I would like to thank the many readers who have sent such kind comments about my novel, "Two Pigs and a Chicken", and to let them know that in response to their requests, a sequel -- "The Maiden All Forlorn" -- will be published around the end of 2005.

I would also like to answer the many questions that I have been asked about the novel's setting. I was deliberately vague about that, stating only that it takes place in "a land which exists not in ordinary space and time, but only in our collective imaginations," because I felt that it was the characters and their story which were important, not the setting.

Despite that, many readers have told me with some certainty exactly where the novel must have taken place. Suggestions have ranged from Ireland or Wales, to Pennsylvania or Ohio, and even the American West. And in my mind, any of these places could have been the setting, depending upon the time frame, as the novel was meant to be a timeless story of love and friendship that could have been set almost anywhere, if it were set in the real world. But it is not set in the real world. It is set in that place where we keep our dreams, and the hope that those dreams will be fulfilled.

The setting is the imaginary land of Erindale, and the Erindale Valley, which is not meant to resemble any specific place, but is inevitably similar to any number of real places. In "Two Pigs and a Chicken", there was no need to reveal any of the local geography, save for the low hill which lies between Gael's farm, and Ryan's farm. In the sequels, more of the landscape will be revealed, so that the reader has some idea how far apart different places are, and the sort of terrain which lies between them; but the geography is not of any importance. It is the people who live in Erindale, and what they are like, and what they do, that is the basis of the stories. So, please feel free to imagine Erindale anywhere, and any way, that you would like it to be.