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Thicker Than Water: Essays by Adult Siblings of People with Disabilities
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| List Price: | $21.95 |
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Product Description
Bound by blood, but not always by love, a sibling can be your friend or rival, defender or detractor--sometimes simultaneously! But what s the impact on that bond when one sibling has a disability?
In this thought-provoking essay collection, thirty-nine adult siblings reflect on how their lives have been indelibly shaped by their relationship with a brother or sister with special needs. Edited by Don Meyer, creator of Sibshops and an expert on sibling issues, Thicker Than Water reveals both positive and negative aspects of growing up with someone who might have received the lion s share of his parents attention or who now requires extra support as an adult.
These compelling essays express a diverse range of sibling experiences and attitudes. Contributors range in age from 20 to 70 and have siblings whose disabilities include Down syndrome, autism, cerebral palsy, seizures, visual impairment, fragile-X syndrome, intellectual disability, or mental illness. Several essays demonstrate how experiences vary based on a writer s age and generation. Many older contributors grew up when disabilities were stigmatized; younger contributors can attest to changing attitudes and greater acceptance of people with differences. Some contributors have chosen to work in a disability field or service profession and credit their siblings for influencing their career choices; others have pursued dreams far removed from a disability field.
This absorbing collection offers other siblings the catharsis of discovery and shared experiences. Thicker Than Water provides fascinating reading for siblings, parents, caregivers, and anyone who shares a long-term relationship with a person with special needs or wonders what that experience may be like.
A common element in all of the essays is honesty. A sibling writes...I did the usual things kids do while growing up--had friends--just never brought them home. Participated in Girl Scouts and cheerleading--just never had my family at events. Did Mom sense my embarrassment at having a brother with multiple disabilities--one who d whoop and strike the air with his fist at inappropriate times? (Is there an appropriate time? Football games?) Or was she ashamed of his behavior and I absorbed this shame? Because shame it was. I was ashamed of Jimmy. There. I wrote it. (Can t quite say it, though.) I was ashamed and now I m ashamed of my shame.
Product Details
- Amazon Sales Rank: #279695 in Books
- Published on: 2009-05-12
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Binding: Paperback
- 226 pages
Features
- ISBN13: 9781890627911
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
- Click here to view our Condition Guide and Shipping Prices
Editorial Reviews
Review
Filled with humor and joy and indescribable moments of self reflection, this resource will fill a gap for the often forgotten siblings of those with disabilities. The book truly fills the void for those who have experienced this situation with honesty and openness. --CAPHIS Consumer Connections
If you're interested in families--any families--you'll find rich, revealing treasures in these pages. And if you're a citizen of the Disability Nation, by blood, marriage, or voluntary alliance, welcome home. --Judy Karasik, co-author, with the graphic novelist Paul Karasik, of The Ride Together: A Brother and Sister's Memoir of Autism in the Family
About the Author
Don Meyer is the director of the Sibling Support Project and creator of Sibshops, lively programs for brothers and sisters of kids with special needs. He is the author of Views from our Shoes and The Sibling Slam Book, also published by Woodbine House. He lives with his wife and four children in Seattle, Washington.
Customer Reviews
You're speaking right to me.
I am an adult sibling. I've met other adult siblings. I've run sibshops. I've worked in the disability field for years. And still, this book amazed me at how it spoke directly to me. Other adult sibs whose siblings have completely different disabilities, and we had the same situations to deal with. I am so glad to have read this book. I purchased a second copy for a good friend who is also an adult sib. We're both passing our copies on to other people as well. A great read.
what a great community!
as a sibling who just drove 5 hours north to spend a day with my sister with cerebral palsy, and then 5 hours home to spend Father's Day with my "immediate" family -- I can relate to all of these essays on family stress and guilt and what should I do questions... All of us are the same even tho all of us have different siblings and situations. We are WHO WE ARE because of our siblings with a disability. We are more sensitive to the world around us, yet we are tougher at times, we are loving parents, but scared to even BE parents, we are mad at our parents for not giving us enough time and attention, but we are the main helpers to our parents.
These essays are well written, and show the sibling relationships in all dimensions. Buy this book for yourself if you are a sibling to a person with a disability, or or your local school system, or for a fried who has "Normal" (haha) kids along with a kid with a disbility -- even if (especially if...) that parent/friend says their children are all treated the same.
A Must Read!
Thicker Than Water was recommended to me by my daughter. Her brother (my son) has Down's Syndrome and just celebrated his 40th birthday. I believe this book should be read by every family with a member who is disabled and with every care giver and agency providing services. It has heart warming as well as sad stories. The perspective of siblings is one we all should understand and accept. My daughter summed the difference with parents and siblings in 4 words: parents want health and safety issues met first; and siblings strive for independence and self-advocacy for their brothers and sisters. This is a MUST READ. My thanks and gratitude to all the authors and especially to Don Meyer for compiling the stories.
