Product Description

Difficult small group members derail discussions with gossiping, arguing, or taking the group off-topic. This reader-friendly, authoritative guide gives solutions for leaders dealing with well meaning but problematic members.

This focused guide trains the novice or experienced group leader to:

Get the quiet ones talking

Squash gossip

Confront counter-productive behavior graciously and target 15 more specific obstacles to small group harmony

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #203207 in Books
• Published on: 2007-04
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Paperback
• 96 pages

About the Author
Pat Sikora is a popular author and conference speaker, and founder of Mighty Oak Ministries. Pat has been involved with small group ministry for more than 30 years and has written and taught extensively on small group challenges. She lives in Redwood City, California, with her husband, Bob.

Customer Reviews

Group Dynamics for Interactive Harmony
With over thirty years of involvement in small group ministry and the unique challenges of group dynamics, Pat Sikora targets over 15 specific obstacles to small group harmony.

The user-friendly format of the book includes charts, illustrations and tips for equipping the small group leader. The book is easy to read, entertaining, and instructive. It is a step-by-step guide for small group leaders, for the novice just starting out or for the veteran mature leader needing fresh ideas to more effectively lead the challenges and interaction of members of a small group ministry. Selected, well chosen Scriptures formulate the principles developed throughout this important hands-on guidebook.

I appreciated Pat's tongue in check humor with the names she assigned the composite problem characters who are apt to create the dynamics within your group: Mona Monopoly, Quentin Quiet, Polly Prayerless, Linda Lazy, Willie Wrong, Grieselda Gossip, and Travis Troubled. Each of these characters represents a possible obstacle to maintaining group harmony and effectiveness. Pat offers solutions to dealing with these well-meaning, problematic individuals.

This is a book that should be on the suggested reading list of Christian Educators and Pastors. Whether you are leading a Bible study, a support group, a recovery group, or a small group of another nature you will find "Why didn't you Warn me?" helpful, informative, entertaining, and a valuable resource tool to be referred to regularly.

Group Dramatics
In the interest of full disclosure I will admit to having had Pat in several of my training sessions when we had an Equipping Center in San Mateo, CA. She was an alert and lively learner who eagerly soaked up everything I taught about Christian growth and healing. Pat has taken her insights to a deeper level of practice.

When I was consulting with the Cell group Movement in Singapore church leaders would say, "Small Groups are Powerful! indicating that small groups were effective places to evangelize unbelievers, disciple believers and heal broken believers.

Pat Sikora also believes and states those things nicely but she adds another part to the mantra: "Small groups are powerfully good or powerfully bad". Pat wisely trains her readers how to minister to the "good, the bad and the ugly" in groups.

Many churches start groups with great excitement but close them prematurely because they do not deal well with "Challenging Group Members" who show up. One or two unchallenged member can destroy the group, turning group dynamics on its head. Instead of growth, healing and evangelistic outreach the group chokes on its members' dysfunctions.

As you read Pat's neat little book, you will find that she humorously describes many of the "Characters" who are attracted to our groups and lays out the various ways a lay leader can successfully deal with them in truth and love. Pat is caring but she is also realistic about how much a group leader can do. She shows unusual candor and courage by lovingly addressing chronic problems without stooping to co-dependency.

Pat wisely includes specific hints, proven over the centuries to be growth producing, that leaders can use to calm and motivate members. She shows how one's voice and non-verbals can cover a multitude of sins and problems. If you ever work with Sunday school classes, committees, task forces or Bible studies, get her book and enjoy its useful insights.

In a small group? You need this book.
Most of us at some point, are a member of a small group. Maybe it's a writer's group (like the two I am in) or a study group, a book review group, a Bible study, or any other type of group. Each group is unique in its makeup and how it operates. Why Didn't You Warn Me is a short, easy-to-read, book that gives leaders and group members the ins and outs of managing a group. It includes detailed helps for dealing with 13 types of members. The book is loaded with extras: In This Chapter summaries and a variety of callout boxes with great information - Caution, Check This Out, Wise Words, Try This, Consider This, and more. In 96 pages, this book offers huge benefits to anyone in a small group. As a small group leader myself, I will use this book to help keep my groups healthy.